by Rebecca Poole, Brisbane, Australia

My strength doesn’t come from my ability to bench press a weight. It certainly doesn’t come from my ability to fight. My strength isn’t in the size of my biceps or the width of my shoulders.

When I was young I thought I had to be physically muscular, athletic, rough and tough to be strong. My experience was that soft girls got walked over, teased, abused, and experienced inappropriate sexual behaviour from men. Understandably, this I didn’t want, so I chose toughness because I thought it was strength.

In my 20’s I began to ask myself “has this toughness really helped me in any way?” I still had experienced abuse and bullying. I still had experienced inappropriate sexual taunts and many, many unwanted breast and arse grabs by “friends” and strangers alike. It hadn’t really prevented any of these things as I thought it would when I was a little girl first experimenting with toughness.

Now at 30, I try something else. . . True Strength, what some might call INNER STRENGTH.

• The strength that allows you to KNOW what is true, just, loving or fair – and the strength that allows you to say ‘NO’ to what is not true, just, loving or fair.
• The strength to do this for yourself, and the strength to do this equally for others.
• The strength to know and say ‘no’, even if you are the only one.

MY strength is in my KNOWINGNESS. That feeling I get in the core of my being that tells me if something is TRUE or NOT. My strength is in my NO. This NO can be loud, quiet or silent because its real strength is in the unwavering quality it is delivered in.